Dear EX best friend

I just really need you right now. And I miss you. And I  know don't mean anything to you. Though you used to say otherwise. I'm sorry I failed you as a friend. I'm sorry I didn't fight enough. But people say I did.  I used to worry about you and try to make sure your happy.


But you know what hurts the most is not the fights and the fact that we may never make up again but rather is the fact that I and you will never have the same dynamic ever again even if we make up. We will never have our weird inside jokes no body understood. We will never have those secrets only both of us knew about. We will never ever be the same. And that what hurts the most. The fact that my instinct to tell you gossip or something great that happened to me or to bitch or just to talk will soon fade away. The fact that my phone won't be filled with our pics and the random memes we send to each other. These facts bring me sadness. And I need a hug and I need ice cream. And comfort. But the sadness truly lies in the fact that we are sitting so close to each other and we both are broken. Our "squad" has broken into two and they are comforting us. The whole class seems to be humming We don't talk anymore not out of cruelty but in rememberance of the jokes we cracked about how if we ever stop talking, they should definitely sing this song. But now as they sing the song I only feel remorse. The girl who took me from weird converse to boots and fuckbois to people who actually liked me is no longer in my life. And that is the last straw and I crack as I cry like I have never cried before. I realise one last thing, the comfort I needed to get over you can only be given by you old chum. As our eyes meet across the room and neither of us ready to run and apologise. I say goodbye and farewell to you one last time. Bye old chum, I love you forever and forever.

Yours truly
Your Ex- Best Friend